Trying Tuesday

I’m a fan of transparency, no smoke and mirrors, no pretending. I like to tell it how it is. Do I try to get the most flattering shot and adjust the lighting and pick looks and strike poses that make me look my best? Absolutely. Do I try to focus on the good and avoid using the captions on this blog to vent my frustrations? Of course. But I also like to use this space for good and to provide inspiration, both aesthetic and spiritual, and to do that I have to be honest that life isn’t always rosy. 

Some days it’s hard to be and feel productive, some days I’m not in the mood to get dressed, and you know what? I don’t always like my body. There, I said it. I’m all about body positivity, and every single body IS a good body. It’s a gift from Hashem that He wants you to take care of, and it’s where your soul resides. My body is my temple. But sometimes the body that I love so much and that takes such good care of me is bloated, or isn’t on it’s A game or it feels like it’s rebelling against me – doesn’t everyone have those days? Sometimes my body’s doing just dandy but still, my mind rebels against IT. I take it into my head that it’s a bad body, and once something’s in my head, it’s hard to get it out. 

So how do I deal with that? With those days that sometimes turn into a week? Sometimes I admit defeat. On those days, I stay in my pajamas if I can get away with not leaving the house. Or I wear gym clothes for that unavoidable trip to the grocery store. Or I throw on anything I have I my closet because school doesn’t close for a bad day. On those days, I skip the blog. Maybe I’ll take a selfie or seven, but the photographic evidence just makes it worse and those pics don’t get posted.

But sometimes I refuse to be defeated by a little bloating, by negative thinking. So I pull myself together. I spend extra time in front of the mirror and change a hundred times until I find a look that makes me feel good. I put on the bright lipstick, the awesome sheitel. I do a mini photoshoot in front of my bedroom mirror and then I share it here. I am alive, so I live. Does it always make everything all better? Absolutely not. But it sure does help.

Headband: Forever 21 | Lip: NYC Expert Last Lipstick in Forever Fuchsia | Necklace: Anthropologie | Top: Banana Republic | Skirt: Ann Taylor Loft | Flats: Banana Republic